Recently, a question has been floating around the internet and has been the subject of discussion on many talk shows: If men had a 9 p.m. curfew, how would women act differently? There have been a variety of answers and they are all heartbreaking.
The answers include things like: they'd walk outside without fear, they wouldn't feel the need to check their backseat before getting into their car and they would feel free to wear whatever they wanted to without worrying about being sexually assaulted. Now, as a female, I can definitely say that I've faced my own share of sexual harassment and I've definitely felt intimidated by many men. I was taught by society from a young age that I shouldn't dress a certain way because if I did, I'd be attracting the wrong kind of attention. When I was being sexually harassed and followed to my car by a customer at my old job, instead of anyone helping me, I was given pepper spray by my coworkers. If I was ever at a party, I was told not to ever put my drink down in case a man tried to drug me. I was told that taking self-defense classes are a necessity for women. So I understand where these women are coming from.
But the issue is more complicated than that. I've been sexually harassed during broad daylight, surrounded by witnesses, even when I was a minor. If predators were taken off the streets at night, they'd still be willing and able to harass or hurt women during the day. It wouldn't solve the issue. But it's still even more than that. I shouldn't have had to grow up fearing men and being taught to take extra precautions to protect myself. Men should've been taught not to act that way. That's where the effort should've gone, to teaching those men to respect women. It breaks my heart to think about all of the time that I've spent worrying for my safety when I shouldn't have had to.
But there is another side to this. Not all men are predators. Not all men disrespect women. Not all men don't understand boundaries. Not all men should be feared.
I have a newborn son with his whole life ahead of him. He's sweet, innocent and pure. And I will raise him to be a gentleman that respects women and would never hurt anyone. The idea that one day, a woman would feel threatened by him just because he was walking behind them on the sidewalk one day, kills me.
No matter what, even though there are bad men in the world, people need to know that there are still good men out there and there will continue to be. Just like women. This issue is not gender specific because disrespect and harassment can be done by both genders.
I know that this is just a hypothetical question, but in my opinion, it wouldn't be the solution anyway. I don't know what the right answer is. Maybe there isn't one because no matter what we do, there will always be bad people in the world. All that we can do is do our best to protect ourselves and try our hardest to end the cycle.
-Chelsea
